The Envelope ***

Vimal looked tense. His baby was sick, and the doctor’s bill had emptied his wallet. And now his brother in law had come, and Asha was suggesting dinner out. No choice. He would have to withdraw the last $500 and skimp for the next few days up to payday.

Vimal was too proud to broach the subject to Asha. She came from a well to do family and would never understand. She knew Vimal’s savings were meager when they got married, but did not realise that he was scraping the bottom of the barrel now. He earned a reasonable salary but things always came up unexpectedly, and nowadays every month was a struggle. It cannot go on like this. He would have to talk to Asha. But he was afraid how she may react. Would she tell her parents and ask for help? That would be the worst thing that could happen. Of course Mr Purushothaman was a generous man. But Vimal’s pride would be shattered. He would not be able to face them again. He would have to keep this to himself. At least for now.

Mathavan lowered the newspaper and looked at his son. He could instantly tell that Vimal was all tensed up. What was the matter with him? He had a good job, a beautiful wife, and now an adorable daughter. Why couldn’t he be happy? He always looked as if all the troubles of the world were on his shoulder.
“டேய், என்னடா குடி முழ்கி போன மாதிரி இருக்கே? எப்ப பார்த்தாலும் சொகமாவே இருக்க? என்ன பிரச்சனை உனக்கு ?”
(Dey, why are you looking so glum ? Lately you have been looking depressed all the time. What is the problem ?)
Vimal just shook his head.
“ஒண்ணும் இல்லப்பா.” (Nothing dad).

***
Vimal and Asha had left. Sundari came up and sat next to Mathavan.
“You know, I think something is troubling Vimal.”
“Yes I know. I asked him. He wouldn’t say.”
“What do you expect. We should understand. He has commitments. He is careful. But his wife comes from a rich family. And she has brothers and sisters. They have to live up to them. All this is becoming great pressure on Vimal. He is finding it difficult to cope. And he can’t talk to anyone about it either.”
“Oh…. I see.”
Mathavan sat thoughtfully. Sundari was soon engrossed in the serial.

***
Vimal appeared more cheerful today. He played with his daughter, smiling at her adoringly. Mathavan watched for a while. Then he got up and went to his desk. He returned with the yellow envelope. Mathavan looked at the envelope. It looked bright and shiny. He handed it to Vimal. Vimal looked up.
“What’s this appa?”
“It’s nothing. Just a little help from your father. To help you cope.”
Vimal’s face fell. He looked at the envelope. Then he looked down. The silence was awkward. Vimal could feel his wife’s eyes on him. He dared not look up. The shame was unbearable.
“Vimal, take it. I know you are struggling. You need it.” He thrust the envelope at Vimal.
Vimal got up abruptly.
“Asha, come on. It’s late. Let’s go. Goodbye appa. Goodbye amma.” He grabbed his little daughter and moved to the door.
Mathavan stood uncomprehending. He still held out the yellow envelope. He stood still holding out the envelope long after his son had left. He turned slowly, to see Sundari watching him. He looked at the yellow envelope. It looked very different now. It was no longer bright and shiny.
***
Vimal was silent and brooding in the car. Asha watched him. Then she touched his arm.
“Why does he have to be so condescending. Am I a beggar? I can manage my life. I don’t need his charity.” Vimal burst out, as his emotions broke free.
Asha stroked his arm delicately.
“Your parents love you. He was just being your father. He did it out of love. You should take it in that spirit. You should not have hurt him.”
Vimal looked at his wife. He stopped the car.
“I think I need to go back.”
Asha squeezed his arm and smiled.