Govind headed for the backlane, a short walk from his house. Venkatachalam’s thosai shop. The shop was the back portion of a Chinese coffee shop, best accessed from a backlane, next to Ah Lee’s mechanic shop. The choice was: thosai or idly. Of course there was coconut chutney, sambar and onion chutney. Divine. And best eaten on one of the long tables, sitting on the wooden benches in the shop. He could afford one thosai and one idli for the 15 cents he had. No choice. “தண்ணி வேணாம் ?” (Don't you want a drink?) Mr Venkatachalam enquired. But he already knew the answer. Govind shook his head. Mr Venkatachalam smiled, placing a glass of water near him.
***
Govind did well in school. He was shunted into the science stream. As he finished school, his father decided that he should do Engineering. So Govind did engineering. Govind’s uncle wanted him to work for him. So he did. And his aunt had a girl in mind, who would make a perfect wife for Govind. Govind married her. His wife wanted two children. So they did. Govind enjoyed this blissful freedom from choice.
***
Gowri sat with her parents, looking at their scribbled notes – trying to decide which college she should go to, and which course she should take up. The research into the pros and cons, and the decision making had taken up many months. Gowri’s life had always been about choosing choosing and choosing. From what to eat for breakfast, to what clothes to wear to which movie to go to. When Gowri’s parents wanted to remodel their house, nearly a year was spent on studying available options. And then, Gowris’ marriage. It was an arranged marriage. Arranged after combing through nearly a thousand prospective boys, based on criterias, priority qualities and shortlistings. Finally it was decided. Govind.
***
At first it looked like a clash of ideologies. Freedom of choice vs Freedom from Choice. Initially Govind was appalled that Gowri would spend more time and effort in deciding things rather that just getting on with it. Then he made a choice. To let her do the choosing. It was a harmonious and complementing arrangement.
***
Govind entered the cavernous dining room of the hotel. “Pasta”, “Chinese”, “Mexican”, “Continental”, “French”. The signs indicated the sections of the dining hall catering for food from all parts of the world. Each section had at least several dozen dishes. The dessert area occupied a huge area of floor. Ice cream flavours totaled nearly two dozen. With more than a hundred choices of toppings.
Govind stood for a while, alone, weak and overwhelmed. He looked around, half expecting to see Gowri. He longed for the simple choices at Venkatachalam’s shop.
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Monday, September 28, 2009
Victorination ***
The blase victorinations had commenced the day before, and by noon, macriegious venominals could be seen pirrhoutted in the sky. Spattered egrarian beggerment doffed the landfall. Crowds of pinaculars had flooded the streets since early evening, with goisterous baiety preverberating all over.
Kinnian soldiers marched in dunison as quinwerential loops gilded the siderations. Xalu watched in egrerity. The scene bactracked him to eternity. He felt a peer volute in his throat. Why only now? After such a long plethora of dementia? Surely there is a fissure?
Xalu came hirsutely back to the present, woefully unpretentious. Finally umbraginations had come along. Verifying his own sort was iterative. Can it be true? Or was it just another imporrissive dream? Xalu was unsure. But he decided to take the plumage.
Xalu steepled off the terg, just as the gargantuan obsecrity rolled up.
Peace, at last.
Everyone counted the obsequos serenity in predisposable denominations. An aberation never to be reduplicated in quintessential juriscrudence.
Kinnian soldiers marched in dunison as quinwerential loops gilded the siderations. Xalu watched in egrerity. The scene bactracked him to eternity. He felt a peer volute in his throat. Why only now? After such a long plethora of dementia? Surely there is a fissure?
Xalu came hirsutely back to the present, woefully unpretentious. Finally umbraginations had come along. Verifying his own sort was iterative. Can it be true? Or was it just another imporrissive dream? Xalu was unsure. But he decided to take the plumage.
Xalu steepled off the terg, just as the gargantuan obsecrity rolled up.
Peace, at last.
Everyone counted the obsequos serenity in predisposable denominations. An aberation never to be reduplicated in quintessential juriscrudence.
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Bengaluru ****
Gopi waited in the BMW, speaking on his cellphone. "I have a late evening appointment. I have to be at the airport at 9. Ok, ok. Bye"
He was waiting for little Lavu to come out of school. Soon the school bell sounded, and little kids could be seen all over, racing to their respective cars. Lavu ran up shortly, carrying her Barbie school bag and Hannah Montana water bottle.
"Look, I got 2 stars today," she gushed. "And there will be a school trip next week. We are going to Kishkinta. See my diary."
As Lavu continued to relate all that happened at school that day, Gopi manoeuvred the car through the madness of Bengaluru traffic, smiling at her and grunting occasionally. Soon they were at the posh villa at Bagehalli. Gopi dropped off Lavu, handing her over to Chandamma, the maid.
"Make sure Lavu eats her cereal before you send her for the piano class," he reminded Chandamma. Then he left the 5 crore rupee villa , heading for the Whitefield Business Park, and the Corporate Offices of Raqqis India, the multi-billion rupee enterprise where both Gopi and his wife worked.
***
It was quite late. Jaishri waited in the tiny living room of their one-room flat. Dinner was chapathi and dhall, which Jaishri had brought back. She waited for her husband. He had called earlier and said he would be late.
As she waited, Jaishri was thoughtful. Life was tough, the cost of everything had shot through the roof. But at least they had jobs. Jaishri was a cook at Raqqis.
Just then the BMW drove up, and her husband Gopi alighted.
He was waiting for little Lavu to come out of school. Soon the school bell sounded, and little kids could be seen all over, racing to their respective cars. Lavu ran up shortly, carrying her Barbie school bag and Hannah Montana water bottle.
"Look, I got 2 stars today," she gushed. "And there will be a school trip next week. We are going to Kishkinta. See my diary."
As Lavu continued to relate all that happened at school that day, Gopi manoeuvred the car through the madness of Bengaluru traffic, smiling at her and grunting occasionally. Soon they were at the posh villa at Bagehalli. Gopi dropped off Lavu, handing her over to Chandamma, the maid.
"Make sure Lavu eats her cereal before you send her for the piano class," he reminded Chandamma. Then he left the 5 crore rupee villa , heading for the Whitefield Business Park, and the Corporate Offices of Raqqis India, the multi-billion rupee enterprise where both Gopi and his wife worked.
***
It was quite late. Jaishri waited in the tiny living room of their one-room flat. Dinner was chapathi and dhall, which Jaishri had brought back. She waited for her husband. He had called earlier and said he would be late.
As she waited, Jaishri was thoughtful. Life was tough, the cost of everything had shot through the roof. But at least they had jobs. Jaishri was a cook at Raqqis.
Just then the BMW drove up, and her husband Gopi alighted.
Sunday, September 13, 2009
The Thief ***
Yugan stood in the middle of the living room, shell shocked and speechless. His wife Ginny was hysterical. Her new I-phone was gone. As were the new laptops and the camera Yugan had just bought. Their only valuable possessions in the world – gone.
***
The security CCTV recording was crystal clear. The thief looked relaxed and non-chalant, carrying away his new acquisitions. His face was extremely recognisable as he defiantly looked up at the camera.
***
The Police Inspector looked around Yugan’s house and made a list of the stolen items. He viewed the CCTV and took away the original recording. “Should be able to get him,” the Inspector left.
***
“What the heck la you, Douglas, you went and curi from these poor young kids? Can’t you choose some rich fat cat ah ?” Inspector Talib was on the phone.
Douglas giggled on the other end of the line. “Too easy to resist la boss. By the way, boss, I got some info for you la boss. This 14th, woman named Shereen. Coming on evening flight from Mexico City. Big consignment.”
Talib was all ears. This could be the big one.
Yugan & Ginny’s problem was already forgotten.
***
The security CCTV recording was crystal clear. The thief looked relaxed and non-chalant, carrying away his new acquisitions. His face was extremely recognisable as he defiantly looked up at the camera.
***
The Police Inspector looked around Yugan’s house and made a list of the stolen items. He viewed the CCTV and took away the original recording. “Should be able to get him,” the Inspector left.
***
“What the heck la you, Douglas, you went and curi from these poor young kids? Can’t you choose some rich fat cat ah ?” Inspector Talib was on the phone.
Douglas giggled on the other end of the line. “Too easy to resist la boss. By the way, boss, I got some info for you la boss. This 14th, woman named Shereen. Coming on evening flight from Mexico City. Big consignment.”
Talib was all ears. This could be the big one.
Yugan & Ginny’s problem was already forgotten.
Indians protest “theft” by Malaysia ***
NEW DELHI, Feb 30 – Indians are outraged at Malaysia’s depiction of the Bharathanatyam dance in a tourism advertisement as a Malaysian heritage. Malaysia has been showing Indian dances and other items as part of its culture under its “Malaysia, Truly Asia” theme.
The president of the Delhi United National Cultural Enterprise (DUNCE), Prof Dr Baldev Singh said that Bharathanatyam was clearly an Indian heritage. “How can Malaysia claim it ? We are outraged.” He screamed.
Dr Thiruvalluvar, head of the Heritage Organisation of Dravidians (HOOD) said this was not an isolated incident. He claimed that thousands of Indian words have been stolen and incorporated into the Malaysian language, some thinly disguised by slight spelling changes. He wanted an immediate end to this wholesale thievery.
The Prime Minister of India expressed surprise that Malaysia had behaved this way. “We always believed that our relationship was based on trust. We never expected this from the Malaysians. We will henceforth be more vigilant.” He refused to confirm reports that India was reviewing major highway projects awarded to Malaysian companies, as well as imports of palm oil. "The Indian High Commissioner in Kuala Lumpur has been recalled for consultations," he said.
Indians have been rioting on the streets of Indian cities, and calling for action against Malaysia.
Indian cities are among top destinations for Malaysians. Travellers are opting not to take risks with their safety as threats against Malaysians in the republic have escalated over the past few weeks.“There have been more than 50 per cent cancellations as of today. People pay for holidays to unwind and enjoy themselves, not to worry about their safety,” said an industry operator. He said besides the influenza A (H1N1) pandemic, the current situation had added to the losses the tourism industry was suffering. Meanwhile, the Foreign Ministry and the Malaysian embassy in India will continue to monitor the situation closely and issue regular reports. An operations room has been set up to receive reports of any related incidents from members of the public, especially Malaysian citizens currently in India. The anti-Malaysia movement in India did not only take their anger to the streets but also through the Internet.
On the social networking site Facebook, for example, the Anti-Malaysia groups are a hit among Indians , whose members are mostly youngsters.The Anti-Malaysia group has 1,315,000,000 members.The movement has been accusing Malaysia of "stealing" Indian culture and heritage for many years. "Even the word 'curi' which means to steal has been stolen from Hindi," said Josef Stalin, a protester.
Members have also posted criticisms and derogatory comments on the site while over 2,000 members participated in a discussion to voice their dissatisfaction at Malaysia.There are also hundreds of photos and videos mocking the country.
In Chennai three youths self-immolated themselves in protest, claiming that the Bharathanatyam belonged to the Tamils. Meanwhile the Dravida Munnetra Kazhagam led by Tamil Nadu Chief Minister Kalaignar Karunanithi announced that members will go on an indefinite fast to protest against Malaysia. "We will not give up our culture. உடல் மண்ணுக்கு உயிர் தமிழுக்கு ", he proclaimed.
Meanwhile in London, the British Commonwealth office revealed that many English words too have been stolen and surreptitiously incorporated into the Malaysian Language. Lord Mc Guinness, the Chief Commissioner, demanded that Malaysia pay royalty on these words. Where the spellings are altered, a discount could be considered, he offered.
The president of the Delhi United National Cultural Enterprise (DUNCE), Prof Dr Baldev Singh said that Bharathanatyam was clearly an Indian heritage. “How can Malaysia claim it ? We are outraged.” He screamed.
Dr Thiruvalluvar, head of the Heritage Organisation of Dravidians (HOOD) said this was not an isolated incident. He claimed that thousands of Indian words have been stolen and incorporated into the Malaysian language, some thinly disguised by slight spelling changes. He wanted an immediate end to this wholesale thievery.
The Prime Minister of India expressed surprise that Malaysia had behaved this way. “We always believed that our relationship was based on trust. We never expected this from the Malaysians. We will henceforth be more vigilant.” He refused to confirm reports that India was reviewing major highway projects awarded to Malaysian companies, as well as imports of palm oil. "The Indian High Commissioner in Kuala Lumpur has been recalled for consultations," he said.
Indians have been rioting on the streets of Indian cities, and calling for action against Malaysia.
Indian cities are among top destinations for Malaysians. Travellers are opting not to take risks with their safety as threats against Malaysians in the republic have escalated over the past few weeks.“There have been more than 50 per cent cancellations as of today. People pay for holidays to unwind and enjoy themselves, not to worry about their safety,” said an industry operator. He said besides the influenza A (H1N1) pandemic, the current situation had added to the losses the tourism industry was suffering. Meanwhile, the Foreign Ministry and the Malaysian embassy in India will continue to monitor the situation closely and issue regular reports. An operations room has been set up to receive reports of any related incidents from members of the public, especially Malaysian citizens currently in India. The anti-Malaysia movement in India did not only take their anger to the streets but also through the Internet.
On the social networking site Facebook, for example, the Anti-Malaysia groups are a hit among Indians , whose members are mostly youngsters.The Anti-Malaysia group has 1,315,000,000 members.The movement has been accusing Malaysia of "stealing" Indian culture and heritage for many years. "Even the word 'curi' which means to steal has been stolen from Hindi," said Josef Stalin, a protester.
Members have also posted criticisms and derogatory comments on the site while over 2,000 members participated in a discussion to voice their dissatisfaction at Malaysia.There are also hundreds of photos and videos mocking the country.
In Chennai three youths self-immolated themselves in protest, claiming that the Bharathanatyam belonged to the Tamils. Meanwhile the Dravida Munnetra Kazhagam led by Tamil Nadu Chief Minister Kalaignar Karunanithi announced that members will go on an indefinite fast to protest against Malaysia. "We will not give up our culture. உடல் மண்ணுக்கு உயிர் தமிழுக்கு ", he proclaimed.
Meanwhile in London, the British Commonwealth office revealed that many English words too have been stolen and surreptitiously incorporated into the Malaysian Language. Lord Mc Guinness, the Chief Commissioner, demanded that Malaysia pay royalty on these words. Where the spellings are altered, a discount could be considered, he offered.
Sunday, September 6, 2009
நினைத்தாலே புளிக்கும் ***
The starting scene has Shiva on a phony looking plane. Shiva is needled by the bloke sitting next to him, who in typical Indian fashion, persists in knowing every little detail about what Shiva is up to. Just when you think Shiva would grab the chap by his throat and throttle him, the scene shifts to a flashback.
Shiva is reminiscing about his college days. “College days – they were the best days of my life,” he muses. And why so? We see soon enough. He and his pals jeer and heckle another student who comes to college by moped (a type of motorised bicycle), and then beat up a guy who is pursuing a girl, because Shiva thinks he shouldn’t be doing so. They mix cheap whisky into Pepsi and feed it to a girl student, causing all round cheer for all except the girl in question. Then they make insolent fun of their lecturer, who is trying his best to teach them chemistry. Aren’t college days great ?
Shiva and his group are incensed because a hostel mate got a stomach upset, after eating the hostel food. They leave the class in a group, and head for the canteen. Once there, they empty a bag of live cockroaches onto the lunch of the College Principal, Warden and assorted lecturers. Whereupon the Principal promptly acknowledges their legitimate grouse, and orders changes to the Hostel management.
In between there is much singing and dancing. One song openly calls on Allah to do whatever the students want Him to do. If the right people see this scene, there could be a ban on the song, or even the movie, which wouldn’t be an entirely bad thing.
Then one day, Shiva decides the College needs a Students’ Union. He instigates a “strike”, ignoring the pleas of the Principal and management, and leads the students in violent clashes with the police. Finally the College management gives in and approves the Union.
Then come Union Elections. Naturally Shiva is a Candidate. And the villain, Vasu, instead of standing against Shiva, cleverly manoeuvres Shiva’s girlfriend , Meera to do so. And she does. This leaves Shiva fuming. Many things happen, and finally Shiva and Meera both have to leave the college.
***
It was Sakthi's dream that these classmates should have a reunion ten years from graduation. But Sakthi dies under mysterious circumstances. His parents decide to fulfill their departed son's dream and bring his classmates together for a reunion.
It is during this event that Shiva is found, almost dead, strangled by a guitar wire (is that possible?) Naturally everyone suspects the villain, Vasu. But turns out it was actually a Muslim girl, Shali who did it. This girl was making up the background crowd throughout the movie, and most viewers would have thought that she was there to represent the minority Indian Muslim community. But there is more to it. Apparently she was in love with Sakthi (which no one suspected). One day during the election fracas, Shiva muzzles Sakthi to death with a chloroform soaked cloth, not realising who it was. Shali saw this but kept quiet for 10 years. After he had killed Sakthi, Shiva realised his mistake. But he too kept quiet for the next 10 years.
The coming together of the classmates is an occasion for the participants to regurgitate the past and go nostalgic. Everything turns out fine for Shiva, who finally marries Meera. The rest watch and cheer.
Waste of 2 ½ hours and RM 11.
Saturday, September 5, 2009
Projambat ****
Dato’ Bakri Senan was pleased with himself. He rubbed his hands in glee. The mother of all mega projects. And he was piggy-backing on the PM’s 1-Malaysia concept. Brilliant.
***
The team was dressed super smart. Dato’ Bakri, his uncle Abu Seman and their partner Dato’ Tan Ah Chai were the only Malaysians. The rest were whites, a couple of Chinese, and the three African financiers. A formidable team. Dato’ Bakri looked at them, all seated in the waiting area of the Minister’s office. Malaysia Boleh. 1- Malaysia. He smiled at Abu Seman proudly.
***
The tall white guy had a commanding voice. The minister listened attentively. The officers sat around, disinterested. A few were waiting for cues from the Minister on how they should react. They were waiting for any tell-tale signs.
“Our concept is in consonance with the One-Malaysia idea. As Malaysia embarks on a period of unprecedented economic growth, social progress and cultural development, key infrastructure projects will play an important role in the success of the region. From superhighways and bridges to express rail links and development regions the most dynamic projects will connect people and regions.Our bridge is designed to be the world’s longest link at 680.93 km. It will be entirely privately funded. The East West Bridge (Projek Jambatan Barat Timur - Projambat) will connect peninsular Malaysia and Sarawak across the South China Sea. An ambitious project that will fuel the growth of Malaysia and Southeast Asia and have a lasting global impact, the crossing will provide increased political security and ignite social change across the region.The creation of a crossing between the Malaysian peninsula and East Malaysia will dramatically change .............. " he went on.
The Minister was in a reverie. If only he could pull this off, he was secure for a few generations. Some of the officers were also eyeing the minister, hoping he would make some positive noises. They could see immense possibilities and opportunities.
***
The African financier was speaking now. His English was highly accented, and barely decipherable.
“This ah privately funded initiative (PFI) and de project will fuel the growth of Mahlaysiah without playcing annecessary burden on gahvmint. De total cost is estimated at RM 520 billion, and will be fully financed by ahs. De money will be raised through Zimbabweh Dollar Bonds, raised in the International Mahket. Ah course we will require Mahlaysian Gahvmint Guarantees and Securites.”
A lot of mental calculations were going on in several peoples’ heads, once the figure of RM 520 billion was mentioned. 
The Minister was looking at the map showing the bridge alignment.
"Could we make it touch that Island midway ? Maybe we could make it a little crooked.”
There were loud guffaws of laughter. The ice was broken. Many heaved sighs of relief.
***
The press was eagerly waiting.
“We have just seen a proposal for a link Bridge between East and West Malaysia. It is a physical realisation of 1- Malaysia, which our beloved Prime Minster has asked us to work towards. It is fully financed by Zimbabwe , and the proponents have assured us it is a safe, viable and profitable project and expected to bring immense benefits – economic, social, political and many other ways. The Government fully supports the project, and our officers will work with the proponents to iron out the details. No questions.”
Dato’ Bakri showed the thumbs up sign, and nodded at Abu Seman and Dato’ Tan.
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
The Plan ***
Ramamurthy: Can we ever redeem ourself in the eyes of the people ? They are beginning to accrue doubts about our very integrity.
Senapathy: Well Rama, as a political party we should be representing them, but we have played into the hands of the communist opportunists. We are seen as their lackeys. In the eyes of the people, we are only concerned about our own interests. We are fat cats.
Ramamurthy: But many stayed on course.
Senapathy: In the hope that we might change. Remember, in 1969 they had once abandoned us in a big way. In 2000 the majority decided that enough was enough, and repeated their disdainful disgusted dismissal a la 1969. Yet we never noticed.
Ramamurthy: Are you saying the writing was on the wall, yet we did not notice the winds of change?
Senapathy: What else?
Ramamurthy: But why ? What caused this?
Senapathy: The corruption. It infuriated the community. That to a large extent led to the peoples’ growing disenchantment with the party that had got them their glorious independence. But over and above that, the singular most humiliating factor that convinced them has been our servile silent sycophantic relationship with the communists. I cringe in shame, when I think of it.
Ramamurthy: Sena, we had won the latest by-election?
Senapathy: Yes. We got ourselves overly ecstatic with that fluke victory. And by going in with that arrogance, we shot ourself in the foot.
Ramamurthy: I don’t think it’s that bad, our rivals have been concocting all sorts of imagined threats looming with the communists within reach of power.
Senapathy: I hate to agree with them, but in this case they are right. Their view is fully vindicated. The commies have been confusing the people with their sleight of hand, their exploitative braggadocio and dare. “Resist, hold fast, never give way”, and we have been at the forefront with them, echoing these foolish admonishments. When we knew very well we were pushing ourselves into a corner.
Ramamurthy: The Communists always seem to be championing the downtrodden.
Senapathy sneered: Yeah Yeah. The poor. They shaft the poor at every chance. That’s what they do. And by getting us into their camp, they have finally twisted the knife of insult by one further turn.
Ramamurthy: What you say are not yet facts. We cannot make 180-degree about-turns, that would be suicidal.
Senapathy grudgingly agreed to that possibility.
Ramamurthy: Listen, we are going out there and will stand firmly behind our comrades. Let\s play by ear. We will hive them off at the suitable time. Which I want you guys to start planning for, beginning now. Remember, we have to come out smelling good, and not as if we were taken for a ride all along.
Senapathy: At least you are seeing the light. Don’t worry I will given them the royal shaft. They won’t know what hit them. And don’t feel any pangs. We are putting the people right up there.
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